DEFINITION

Self-confidence is not synonymous. Self-esteem is more an affective sense of accepting one's self or self-worth. Self-confidence is the expectation of success, but is not related to the value of the activity. 

Persons with medium self-esteem appear to be relatively similar to those with high self-esteem, with the exception they are more likely to become dependent upon others being uncertain of their worth and inclined to be unsure of their performance relative to others.2

Low self-esteem people, reared under circumstances of rejection, uncertainty and disrespect, have come to believe they are powerless and without resource or recourse. They feel isolated, unlovable, incapable of expressing and defending themselves, and too weak to confront and overcome their deficiencies. Too immobilized to take action, they tend to withdraw and become overtly passive and compliant while suffering the pangs of anxiety and the symptoms that accompany its chronic occurrence.2

A self-fulfilling prophecy evolves as persons with high self-esteem, conditioned and fortified by favorable treatment and by performance they believe to be successful, appear far more likely to expect successes in their social and academic encounters than are individuals with low self-esteem who come to expect rejection, disrespect and failure. 
 
 

	nearly total acceptance of the child
	clearly defined and enforced limits
	high expectations for performance
	respect and latitude for individual actions within the defined limits

Parents of high self-esteem children are concerned and attentive toward them; the structure of their worlds is appropriate with relatively great freedom. Low self-esteem is associated with the experience of rejection, disrespect, chaotic environments where the individual cannot determine what to expect. Application of consequences appear arbitrary and illogical.

So our view of ourselves is determined by how others value us, right?

Perhaps interpersonal & intrapsychic feedback systems play a role.1

	To the extent the person copes with it, an increase in the development of realistic personal identity will result
	To the degree avoidance is favored, an increase in one's tendency to try and gain the approval of others by impression management ~ that is pretending to be what we believe is most acceptable to others
	Self-evaluative processes are a psychological reality for most people. Self-evaluations form a continuous feedback loop about our sense of adequacy. The mere volume and weight of this feedback far surpasses the feedback we receive from external sources

This permits people to retain a negative self-view despite the approval from others.
 
 

Self Esteem is the result of coping1 

Avoidance is the process of escaping perceived uncomfortable situations1

Self-Esteem = successes/pretensions. Our self-love can be increased by either increasing the numerator (successes) or by decreasing the denominator (the pretensions we aspire to).

In spite of the possible laudatory judgements of significant people in one's life, the individual's self-evaluations regarding their choosing to avoid difficult situations leaves them with an unacceptable balance.

High self-esteem stems from achievement and acceptance.

Steps to Reconstruction of one's Self-Esteem1

    Avoidance

	Recall a situation you typically avoid
	Describe how all parties behave in the event
	Choose 3 adjectives that describe how you feel about yourself and behavior in the situation

    Coping

	Repeat the same imagery while relaxing
	Respond as the kind of person you would like to be
	What adjectives best describe how you feel about yourself and conduct

    Results

	In the avoidance image, people usually find self-criticism or derision
	Coping images frequently reflect strength and adequacy
	When avoidance is the optimal response, evaluate the accuracy of your judgements

    Change

	Risk of exposure to feared psychological events; psychological anguish induced in treatment is the first sign of willingness to change - in the direction of coping
	Personal Responsibility is necessary. If I want a different life, different sense of self-worth what do I have to do differently?

        RECOVERY  RELATIONSHIPS  PROCESS     RISK 

2 The Antecedents of Self-Esteem - Coopersmith 

3 Your Child's Self-Esteem - Dorothy Corkille Briggs